Many of you do not know me but a couple years ago I found out that the day are they knew didn’t father me. I found this out through Ancestry DNA and it was confirmed by my mother before she died.
While this is an interesting development and apparently I was the last to know. This is not the basis of my writing today.
The father I knew was abusive, but funny at times.
Until I turned 16, my dad that I knew was a tyrant and abusive. For serious, he tried everything to kill is. Well, my mother, but we were with her most of the time.
When I turned 16, he almost died. I had just got a hair cut and I wanted to show my sisters, who lived with him. He was laying on the couch he couldn’t move. The railing came out of the wall and he fell down the stairs and hit his head on the washer. He could not move, but had my sister carry him to the couch.
Fast forward to the hospital. The doctors told us to say our goodbyes because he wasn’t going to make it through the night. He did and the doctors would work us up several more times within his 16 years of living with his paralysis.
Anyway he came home depressed as ever and bound to kill himself. He was paralyzed from the neck down. The only way he could think of was to starve himself. My Aunt cooked for him and she was a cook in a restaurant so, she cooked good food.
I am remembering the funny parts of hi injury. Like the time the girls snuck some boys in. Well one didn’t want to go out the window so he thought he would walk downstairs in front of my dad.”Who are you?” My dad said, “Nobody” said the stranger.
My dad called for the girls, who pretended to be sleeping. They came down and pretended to look for the stranger. I don’t know if my dad believed them of not that they were sleeping. But they seemed to get away with it.
People who are paralyzed have a greater sense of smell. One night myself and my sister were drinking, Ole English. Anyway my dad called her over. Shit we are caught. I did some quick thinking and orange juice was just what she needed to fool a paralyzed man.
Another time my sisters, I, and the boys were in the back yard ‘camping.’ Over the monitor my dad screamed “It’s got me. It’s got me.” We ran in thinking it was a burglar. It was a mosquito on his toe.
There were some funny shit and some serious stuff that happened. But eventually he went to a nursing home. People with his injuries are placed in a double room, but he needed a private room. In that home the only single rooms were in the Alzheimer’s ward. He took it.
For the most part nothing happened until… The facility had a lady with Alzheimer’s that would constantly yell a name. To protect he families privacy I won’t say what name. Just for years we thought that it was her husband. It must have been torture for my dad to lay in bed and listen to he. Because one day he just found out that she was calling her dead sister. For years she would say the same thing over and over.
Fast forward. Did you know people that are paralyzed from the neck down can still have relations? I thought that him chasing nurses around in his chair was bad enough.
I remember the time found out. My now husband and I were talking and I told him my dad was paralyzed and in a home. He told me that this one lady he knows dated a paralyzed man. Come to find out it was my father. Ugh, no one should date your paralyzed father.
And there I will leave my memories. I hope that you find this an interesting read. To those that are in the suicidal stage of your paralysis, you have so many memories to live for. Live and love